Lost. Found.

Things I have lost today:

1. My keys. They were later found on top of a plate of pancakes in the fridge.
2. The baby. He was later found under an end table behind the couch, tormenting a cat (as usual).
3. The bag of sugar. It was later found in the fridge as well.
4. My shoes. They were later found OUTSIDE THE APARTMENT (????)
5. The baby again. He was later found pulling down clothes in his closet.
6. The Dog. He was later found aiding and abetting the baby in the closet.
7. My cell phone. It was later found in the sink (????)
8. My keys again. They were later found in the dog cage.
9. The baby AGAIN. He was later found licking the bookshelves in his room.
10. Um...my mind?

P.S. Reading back from that list, it kind of looks like I'm a neglectful mother, considering the fact that I lost the baby three times. If it helps you imagine the scenario(s) any better, the first time, I was putting cheerios on his tray and took my eyes off him for all of 10 seconds, the second time, I went into the kitchen to warm up a pancake for lunch (and took my eyes off him for maybe 15 seconds), and the third time, I was looking for my keys. That time, I'll admit it was a little bit longer...maybe 45 seconds? The kid has an insane ability to know EXACTLY when I'm distracted and chooses that moment to very quietly sneak off and do something weird. (This, by the way, is the only time he is quiet. Ever.)