Basic Truths

I'm going to mention YET AGAIN that I worked at a daycare. For two years. With babies. So you'd think that a statement as simple as "Babies crawl" would come as no surprise to me, right? As it turns out, you'd be wrong.

Because dude, BABIES CRAWL. I mean, I knew Luke crawled and it necessitated some level of baby-proofing, although we didn't do nearly as much as we could (should?) have because, um, we're lazy. And because we're constantly watching him and it's a small apartment and I mean, we moved all the truly dangerous stuff like the scissors and the sewing needles (once we realized that it was utterly useless to try to teach him not to open the sewing drawer, that is...)

But up until now, Other Baby did not crawl. Well, he kinda did, but he didn't get very far, so usually, I chased after Luke and Other Baby just sort of hung out in one spot and figured out brilliantly genius things like How To Put Together The Shape Puzzle. (Can I just say that Other Baby is going to be High School Valedictorian someday? Because people, he's not even 9 months old and he can already put in the circle and the square. On a puzzle made for TWO-YEAR-OLDS.)

As of today, however, Other Baby crawls. A lot. And of course, today was my long day with him, so my afternoon went something like this:

-Chase down Luke, who is busily splashing in the dog water bowl. Return him to the living room, only to realize that Other Baby is nowhere in sight.
-Have a half panic attack, then realize he's getting into the recycling. Bring him back. Now, Luke is gone.
-Look around, spot him crawling off into the office to push the button on the computer that opens up the CD drawer thing (By the way, McMoose, THANK YOU SO MUCH for teaching the kid how to do that. It makes my days oh-so-much more fun.) Catch him, tell him we don't touch the computer, bring him back and--can you guess?--Other Baby is gone again.
-Search frantically, find him behind the couch, licking the sliding glass doors (Um. The SAME sliding glass doors that the Dog frequently licks. Ew.) Bring him back.
-Now, both babies are in the same place, but Luke's pants are mysteriously missing. Apparently, he chose today to figure out how to take his pants off, which would be okay except that without pants, he has UNRESTRICTED ACCESS to his diaper. And he crawls around in a tripod position with one hand sticking into the back of his diaper. And I'm sorry, but my son is not going to be THAT KID. So I hunt down the pants and wrestle them onto a kicking, screaming baby.
-Of course, during all of this, Other Baby has vanished again and is soon found attempting to eat 12 pieces of carpet fuzz, which he had apparently been collecting and saving for a mid-afternoon snack.

So. Babies? They crawl.