Oh, Frabjous Day

I need to get my windshield replaced because there are two very large cracks in it as a result of cows, trucks, and rocks. Don't ask. So I spent a little while on the phone getting quotes. As a result, I have some pieces of advice for people in the windshield-fixing-business.

1. The proper way to answer a business phone is "[Name of Business], how may I help you?" Or even just "[Name of Business]," if you're feeling a bit fractious. Not "Hey." Not "Huh?" Not "Yup." Because when you say "Hey," "Huh," or "Yup," you then put the customer in the place of having to say "Is this such-and-such company?" and if the customer is feeling peevish, that might just be enough for them to take their business elsewhere. GUESS HOW I WAS FEELING TODAY.
2. If you own a business, get a separate business phone. Seriously. Because if I call the phone number that you have listed as your business phone and you answer it AND THEN TELL ME YOU CAN'T TALK TO ME because you're closed on weekends, it's not going to do a thing to help my peevish mood. And also, on the excel sheet listing all the nearby companies and their price quotes, I'm going to write "Incompetent Jackass" next to your name. (That part did help my mood a little bit.)
3. If you put me on hold when I call you, you'd better be damn sure your phone is working when you take me off hold. Because if I have to sit and wait for you while listening to an annoying jingle for 5 minutes and then, when you finally come back to talk to me, your phone cuts off and hangs up on me? Yeah. Not helping the mood. Or your business, for that matter.
4. If I call for a quote on a windshield replacement, I EXPECT THAT QUOTE TO INCLUDE THE COST OF INSTALLATION. What did you think I was going to do, superglue the thing to my car?