Love/Hate

The conversation at a playdate turned to things we love and hate about being moms. I didn't contribute much to the conversation because outside of the obvious--I love my kid, I'm not terribly fond of poopy diapers--I can't really put my finger on the answer to this question. Or rather, I can't put my finger on what I HATE.

Don't get me wrong: there are things that are hard. There are things that make me wish the clock would hurry up and get to 6 pm, so McMoose would be home and I would at least have someone with whom to share the ridiculousness of my day. But every time one of these "bad things" came into my mind, eight positive factors of the very same thing revealed themselves as well.

Let's start with the sleep deprivation that comes with a 22-month-old who has slept through the night--or rather, who has allowed ME to sleep through the night--exactly four times. Four. Times. And when I say "sleep through the night," I mean for six hours. But then, when he was a newborn and his whole body fit between the palm of my hand and my elbow, I got such joy out of being the only one awake with him in the middle of the night. When he was slightly bigger and starting to smile, it was delightful to see his bright face, even at 2 am. And now, now might be my favorite of all because when he wakes up, McMoose brings him to bed with us and he snuggles in beside me with his sweet, toddler self and sleepily asks me to sing the "Baa song."

And then, there are the weird toddler moments when he's just. not. going to do what I asked. This morning, for example, there was sand in his sandals and he flatly refused to put them back on to walk upstairs, so I had to carry him up to our third floor apartment. And then, when I asked him to at least hold the shoes while I unlocked the apartment, he threw them on the floor. And refused to bring them inside the apartment when I asked. On the other hand, getting up the stairs is SO MUCH FASTER when I'm carrying him and I was hungry, so fast was a good thing. And his pouty face is pretty cute. And when I informed him that he could come inside the apartment when his shoes came with him, he slowly rolled the shoes in with his feet, instead of touching them with his hands because they were "yucky." Even in the moment, that was pretty humorous.

There's the crying in the car, but the flip side of that is singing in the car. There's the fact that my living room is never, ever free of some little emblem of toddlerhood, but then, when he finds a stray toy after we've cleaned up, he exclaims, "Uh-oh, train/truck/book/puzzle! Back to box!" There's the refusal to eat vegetables, but then again, there's the fact that he is always up for trying new foods and behaves wonderfully at restaurants. There's the fact that McMoose and I got all dressed up last weekend, only to have the baby-sitter cancel on us, but then, I got to sit with Luke while he fell asleep and then, we ate yummy food on our living room floor while watching a good movie AND we didn't have to pay anyone sixteen dollars or rush back home at the right time or deal with a toddler who was up past his bedtime.

Granted, there are the poopy diapers. But I do love when the diapers are all washed and fluffy and sitting in the laundry basket, waiting for the next day. Plus, it's funny when I'm changing him and AS I'M CLEANING HIM OFF, he informs me that "Guk not poopy, just wet!"