Fragmented

• There are times when I'm looking out of the bedroom window and I see The Dog wandering around the yard, and the first thought in my head is, "Oh, my goodness, there's an ANIMAL out there!" Which is true enough, but when I think "ANIMAL," I'm not thinking "pet dog," I'm thinking "rabid beast." And though we might describe The Dog as a rabid beast from time to time, he isn't exactly menacing.
• I had trouble sleeping last night, so I lay awake, relishing the quiet and I realized something: Weston wakes up a LOT. I mean, he doesn't always wake ME up or ask for any help in getting back to sleep, but he very frequently stirs, rolls over, picks his head up and looks around, licks the mattress--yes, LICKS the mattress--and just generally moves around.
• Luke is pretty convinced that getting a ticket from the cops is something to be desired. He frequently talks about the prospect of being pulled over in a rather awestruck voice. I worry about that child, sometimes.
• Weston now pulls himself up on everything. Including Yellow Cat, who is not amused by this new development.
• McMoose was trying to toilet train the cats. Apparently, there exists a product that claims to do exactly this and this product actually has decent reviews, so we tried it out. Black Cat took to it superbly. Yellow Cat...well...let's just say he doesn't care for the concept. Ah, if only. But I have to admit, I would feel like I'm living in the house from Meet the Parents.
  

The Return of the Bullet Post

• Luke felt and saw Hopper kick for the first time today. You know those photos with the pregnant mom and the toddler reaching up to feel her belly? I always looked at those and thought, "Aww, how sweet," but the reality was so much sweeter. I told Luke that Hopper was poking him and he thought it was pretty funny.
• It scares me a little bit that at 21 weeks, Hopper's kicks are strong enough to be seen clearly from the outside. I think Luke hit that particular milestone around week 30, maybe? So if this is week 21, what's week 30--or week 40, for that matter--going to be like with this one?!
• It annoys me when the weather website calls for a partly cloudy day with a high of 63 and it's been cloudy and the warmest it's been all day is 55. Really, is it necessary to get my hopes all up? Can't you just predict the worst case scenario so that if it's sunny and warm, I can be happily surprised?
• My normally blue car is currently green because of the pollen in the air. I always forget this about spring in North Carolina, but the next time I'm in the market for a new car, I'm totally buying a green one.
  

New Developments

• The weather has apparently been paying close attention to the calendar recently because all through September, it was hot and hot and then hot some more. And then, October came around and it's positively Autumn-like. I'm liking it!
• Luke understands way more than I give him credit for sometimes. This morning, at the park, he wanted to swing a giant stick around, so I told him he'd have to take it away from where the people were. He responded by running out to a grassy patch, doing his ninja tricks for a few minutes, and then putting the stick down and saying "Bye-bye" to it before rejoining Other Baby in the sandbox. I was left scratching my head because how come he can understand all that, but he STILL doesn't understand not to throw food off the high chair?
• We've been attacked by a deluge of moths. Yes, a deluge. They. Are. Everywhere. And apparently, their favorite hiding place is between the wooden boards on our stairs, probably because they can fly up at you when you step near them and scare you to death. Luke has been loving this development and every time we go down the stairs, he stops every few steps, bends down, says "Hi, Moth!" and waits for them to attack his face. This game is not one of my favorites.
  

Things I've Learned Recently:

1. Beaches are fun. But not as much fun as camping. And also, slightly more stressful, what with all the giant waves and seagulls that try to conspire to steal your small child away from you.

2. My favorite word in Luke's vocabulary is "stuck." Because when he's playing in his room and randomly making noise, it helps to have a key word that I can listen for so I'll know the difference between when he's talking to his stuffed animals and when he has climbed up to the top of some piece of furniture and doesn't know how to get down. The downside is that "stuck" sounds a lot like "truck," which is a word he says approximately every 7.4 seconds, so we have a lot of false calls.

3. You know what's fun? Watching 2 toddlers chase each other around a piece of furniture.

4. You know what's not fun? When the "piece of furniture" is actually the (overdramatic) dog, who howls and whines because they're invading his personal bubble.

5. It is possible to get two sleeping toddlers out of their carseats and up to a third floor apartment at the same time (because obviously, leaving one in the car while taking the other up is not so much an option at an apartment complex) while keeping both asleep. However. One of them will invariably wake up while you're putting the other one in bed. In. Variably.

Quick-post

• I have a serious case of writer's block, hence the dearth of recent posts.
  
• Somehow, writing in bullet form doesn't seem like "real" writing so maybe this will let me circumvent the block.
• I like big words lately.
• So does Luke. Case in point: his new words are touchdown, airplane, and congratulations. Have you ever heard the word "congratulations" as uttered by a 14-month-old? Yeah, it sounds nothing like it's supposed to. Then again, neither does "meow," so why am I surprised?
• We turned his crib into a toddler bed on Friday. BAD. IDEA. Bedtime went from 10-20 minutes of patting to AN HOUR AND A HALF of crawling, climbing, moaning, laughing, kicking the wall, singing, and asking for milk. Dude, what were we thinking?
• He has a fever, which is making it hard for him to walk. I don't know why, but every time he has a fever, he loses all semblance of balance, stumbles around like a tiny, little drunk man and falls over his own feet. Amusing for me, not so much for him.

A Bullet Runs Through It

I know I'm supposed to be working on putting up pictures for Luke's 10 month post, and I'm doing it, I promise, but in the meantime, I'm doing a bullet post because I have a lot of thoughts rattling around my head at the moment.

• It's Thursday again. Lately, I feel like Thursday accounts for approximately 75% of the week. Not that I'm complaining--Thursdays are good days. 2 days until the weekend AND I get to watch a new Grey's Anatomy tonight. Nope, not complaining AT ALL.
• Did you know that cats love strawberries? I had no idea until a few days ago, when I cut up some strawberries for Luke, turned my back for a minute, and by the time I got back, half the strawberries were gone and two cats were hovering around the plate. And this morning, I cut up some more and Yellow Cat has been going CRAZY. In fact, he's currently dragging around the bib that Luke was wearing while eating his strawberries. Who knew?!
• I'm pretty sure I'm going bald. I lost a lot of hair after Luke was born, which is normal, but then it STOPPED and now it has started again. Granted, I have enough hair for three people, so I could probably stand to lose some of it, but I'm thinking of stocking up on Rogaine, just in case.
• Luke's current entertainment: hitting himself over the head with a toy and saying "Oh-OH!"
  
• Did I mention that I have a new laptop? I have a new laptop. It's small and cool and has a battery life of longer than 20 minutes, which is to say it's a HUGE improvement over the old one. As a result of said new laptop, I'm completely hooked onto the Internet again.
  

Bulleted

Bullets. Because I haven't done a bullet post in ages. And also because The Bug--er...Luke--is napping right now and so far, all his naps today have been ridiculously short. So in the interest of getting the most for our time:

• Why does blogger turn bullets into flowers? Just wondering...
• McMoose and I went to dinner at a fancy restaurant in fancy clothes last Friday without Luke. We both got to eat our meals--including appetizer AND dessert--without having to feed, change, or entertain a 2-foot-tall human being. It was exhilarating. And also, oddly lonely.
• I found Yellow Cat sitting inside the dryer this afternoon. Clearly, a habit we'll have to break before we end up with a cat-kebob.
• Apparently, Luke is of the opinion that it's time to grow some teeth. To that end, he has decided to chew on everything, drool on everything, and stop sleeping. After waking up with him approximately every 40 minutes last night, I turned on the fount of wisdom that is Google to find out how long I can expect this awesome phase to last and did you know babies can teethe for months before actually getting a tooth? MONTHS. M-O-N-T-H-S! Guess I'd better start developing my coffee habit now.
• To offset the drooling, chewing, and non-sleeping, he has also decided to become ridiculously endearing. Even more so than he was, I mean. He watches football with us. He burps and then chuckles about it. He entertains himself while I fold laundry or eat lunch or whatever it is that I need to do. He giggles when the Dog licks his toes in the car. The tiredness sucks, but still, I'm loving this stage.

Our Week in Bullets

We've had a big week around here, with lots of activities and changes. Here are a few...

• Yellow Cat figured out how to open the laundry room door earlier this summer, which is highly annoying, but lately, I've been finding his toys sitting INSIDE the washing machine. I still don't know how he does that.
• Luke has figured out that hey! He has hands! He can't get them to do exactly what he wants, but he can hug his favorite toy frog and pull off my glasses when I'm feeding him.
• He has also started "laughing." I put that word in quotes because it's not so much a real laugh as an overly theatrical...um...noise that goes "Ahhh...ahhh...ahhh..."
• We've been looking at SUVs again and I think we've finally decided on one. But there were at least 2 other people looking at it too, so who knows if it will still be available when we call later today to make an offer.
• Luke has also figured out how to use his doorway jumper. And by "use," I mean that he spins around in circles and does this odd, little hop that makes him look like a deranged flamingo. And then, he swings wildly around and I come close to having several heart attacks because his head always comes within CENTIMETERS of the door frame.
• We've been doing things every day this week and as a result of that and the fact that my insomnia has returned in full force, I am worn out. I don't think I've mentioned it on here, but when we realized that I was having supply problems and Luke wasn't gaining weight, the most powerful tool in our arsenal was that we started waking up our child, who was sleeping 9-10 hours each night, at 3 in the morning so that he could have an extra, large feeding. It worked, in that we saw weight gain almost immediately, but as a result of that disturbance each night, I now lie awake for about 2-3 extra hours trying to fall back asleep. And by the time I do, it's 6 in the morning and Luke starts stirring at 6:30.
• But! As a wonderful offset to the insomnia is the fact that Luke, who used to eat for an hour at a time, has figured out how to get the same amount of food in 20 minutes. Do you have any idea how much extra time I have on my hands? I actually straightened up the whole house, scrapbooked, sewed, and then got so bored that I rolled all his blankets up and arranged them artfully in a basket. I vacuumed, I kept up on the laundry, I dusted, I baked. Seriously, I don't know what to do with all this time.
  

Monday Bullets

• I've had a lot of time to analyze baby clothing recently and here's what I've decided: We're spending way too much time and money training our babies to expect lives filled with wild, ferocious animals. At least 75% of Luke's clothing pictures one (or more) of the following: a bear, a lion, a tiger, an alligator, or a dinosaur. And most of those same items of clothing also feature the phrases "Chomp," "Grr," or "Roar." Seems to me it would be far more useful if his onesies had helpful tips for him about how not to scream during diaper changes. I'd much rather he learn that useful skill than learning how to chomp because honestly? The child already has powerful chomping skills and as the person he currently chomps on, I really don't see the need to encourage them any further.
• The kid spent all of yesterday being a complete beast, which is to say that he refused to sleep for longer than 15 minutes at a time. In contrast, he has spent all day sleeping today. Which further reinforces my belief that he thinks each day actually lasts 48 hours and 24 of those hours are for being awake and the other 24 are for being asleep. I've believed this to be true ever since my 6th month of pregnancy, when he would spend an entire day kicking, and then I wouldn't feel him moving AT ALL the next day.
• Yellow Cat has decided that his new favorite activity is to sit on my lap and lick Luke's head while I'm feeding him. Luke is decidedly unhappy with this new development.
• The Dog has been "trapped" under the crib all morning. Since he knows perfectly well how to go in and out from under there, I'm not sure why he suddenly thinks he's trapped, but it keeps him out of trouble...although it is annoying when, every 20 minutes or so, he scratches ferociously at the carpet in an attempt to get untrapped. Come to think of it, maybe Luke's onesies should have a picture of the Dog, along with the caption "Dumbest Animal Alive."
  

Thrown For A Giant Loop

I knew going in that this parenthood thing would come with its share of surprises, but I really didn't expect to be hit with so many in the first six days. I mean, the kid is less than a week old, and already, most of what I thought I knew about babies, based on YEARS of experience with babies of all sizes, shapes, and temperaments has pretty much gone out of the window.

-I had expected that Luke would wake up at least every couple of hours throughout the day and night. Instead, I have given birth to possibly the first child on the face of the planet who can sleep a six hour stretch with no complaints. The trade-off (you knew there was one coming, right?) is that before his six hours of sleeping like an angel, he spends a minimum of one hour screeching like a howler monkey who cannot be comforted, usually at about 1 AM. I'm waiting for the eviction notice any day now.

-I had expected that his two hour sleep sessions would happen in the crib or bassinet. Apparently, he had other plans because while he sleeps great in the bassinet during the day, he has decided that at night, monsters live in there, so the minute we put him in there, he wakes up and acts like a possessed little demon child. End result: more often than not, he ends up in bed with us, where he sleeps like a log until we wake him up to eat. *Sigh*

-I expected a baby who would hate being swaddled, like being rocked and held, and accept a pacifier. What I got is a baby who LOVES being swaddled, but who also possesses the ability to break out of every swaddle imaginable. I guess I could just use duct tape, but I think the law would frown on that. And he likes being rocked and held--by McMoose. The minute he sees me, he starts screeching like a pterodactyl and sits there with his mouth open, waiting for me to feed him. Again. And he takes a pacifier when it suits his needs. In other words, ALMOST NEVER. The rest of the time, if we dare put the paci in his mouth, he starts thrashing his head around like a demented catfish.

I don't know what to make of this kid. All I can say is that I hope he grows out of the screaming-at-the-top-of-his-very-powerful-lungs-for-HOURS-AT-A-TIME soon. Like TODAY.

A Halfway Bullet Post

Now that I'm no longer going to work/school, my days are punctuated by what used to be fairly mundane events--trips to the grocery store, doing a load of laundry, walking the dog. These have now become the Most Exciting Things Ever and I plan them with all the precision of a space shuttle launch. For one thing, I try to plan it so that there's one car ride every day--grocery store, target, gas station--the important thing isn't the destination, but rather, the fact that I get dressed, leave the house, and associate with actual human beings. And while I used to try to cram all my errands into one master trip, now I break them up so that it seems like I have more Important Things To Do.

Unfortunately, even with all the planning, some days still get shortchanged because let's face it, there are only so many errands you can create for yourself. Today, for example, was a day when I had to face the bleak possibility that perhaps I would have to stay home ALL DAY LONG. But then, a wonderful, happy sounding woman from the eyeglass store called to tell me that my glasses were ready to be picked up. That, of course, made my day and motivated me to (a) put on real clothes and (b) eat an actual meal instead of trying to subsist on tea and cheese.

As it turned out, this trip was a lot more exciting than I had initially planned because:

-As I was walking across the wet parking lot, my flip flop fell off my foot and into a rain gutter in what was a very dysfunctional Cinderella moment, so I got to be the Weird Pregnant Woman fishing a shoe out of a gutter with a stick.

-A stranger at the eyeglass store told me that after I have the baby, I should be careful not to bathe him too much, lest he SHED HIS SKIN. Um....like a snake? Has there ever in the history of the world been a case where a baby has shed his skin because he was bathed too much?

-My hope that The Bug inherits McMoose's eyesight was reinforced in a big way when I was waiting for my glasses and got to watch a grown man beg, threaten, and bribe his 6-year-old in an attempt to get him to try on a pair of glasses.

Snippets

Ok, bullet post time. I've been saving up snippets of oddness all week in preparation for today.

• On Monday, I got a phone call from a call center in Utah informing me that the warranty on my car was about to end. A couple of hours later, a call center in Montana informed me of the same thing. And about 30 minutes after that, someone called from Alabama to remind me again. Who knew Toyota was (a) so conscientious and (b) had so many damn call centers!
• On Tuesday, I was walking through the parking lot to my car, when I saw a man wearing a fluorescent yellow vest that was emblazoned with the words "Parking Services." Not so weird, right? Right. Until you consider the fact that he was RIDING A HORSE. The only explanation I can think of is that maybe the University has decided that horses are somehow more cost-efficient than the standard issue white pickup trucks that they used to drive.
• On Wednesday, I found a spider living in my desk drawer. Generally speaking, I am not a fan of spiders and would prefer that they leave me alone. The one in my drawer, however, was oddly endearing, so I have decided to let him stay. After all, it might be fun to have a pet at work. Today, my "pet" was quietly eating another insect when I got to work, which has made me like him even more. Although really, I don't understand why there are so many insects in my office to begin with...

Barbecues, Diets, and Flies

• There were four grown men barbecuing in the parking lot as I was walking to my building this morning. I emphasize the "grown men" part of that sentence because if it had been four college students, I wouldn't really have thought twice about it because...college kids...barbecuing in a parking lot at 10:30 in the morning...on a Thursday...yeah, sounds about right. But balding, paunchy, grown men usually have more sense, not to mention more productive ways of spending their time than trying to light up a grill while arguing over how best to keep their beers cold. Not THESE grown men, clearly.
• On Monday, I went to the doctor, where I was informed that I was gaining too much weight and that I should go on the South Beach Diet, which my midwife translated as "eating small, protein-filled meals every 2 hours." On Tuesday and Wednesday, I tried to follow this ridiculous advice by eating "meals" that consisted of a slice of cheese or a handful of peanuts. Today, I came to my senses and decided that as much fun as it is to live in a state of CONSTANT HUNGER, I'll be a much more pleasant person over the next 8 weeks if I eat like a normal human being, instead of a scavenging hyena.
• I sent a document to be printed about 10 minutes ago, and instead of sending out a sheet of paper, the printer sent out a fly. A living, flying fly. Which is now buzzing around the office. I still haven't gotten the document I printed, by the way.

Sleepy Babblings

• I had a dream last night that I was drowning and when I woke up this morning, my nose felt like it had been breathing in water all night. It was very odd and trippy and has left me feeling like maybe I sleepwalked into the bathtub and accidentally inhaled water or something, but that seems highly unlikely.
• I went to bed at 8:30 last night. Woke up at 9:15 this morning. Got to work at 11 and promptly fell asleep at my desk until 11:30. Worked for two hours, ate lunch, and then fell asleep AGAIN at 2. It is now 2:30, I've just woken up, and I'm thinking about calling it a day so I can go home and go to bed. So I've been asleep for almost 14 of the last 24 hours. AND I'M STILL SLEEPY!
• Yesterday, the temperature was in the 80's. Today, it's in the 50's. Tomorrow, it will be in the 40's. If the weather could kindly make up its mind about what season it would like to be in, it would be much appreciated.

Forgetful Moments

I think I'm starting to lose all my higher brain functioning. Pretty soon, I'll be reduced to grunting and pointing as my only forms of communication.

• Yesterday morning, I put orange juice in my tea instead of milk. And even though I knew the tea tasted a little bit different, it didn't occur to me what had happened until AFTER I finished the entire cup. So this morning, I decided that I would eat cereal instead so that if I did put something strange into it, I'd notice right away. So I poured the cereal and milk into a bowl and took a great big bite, only to realize that my "cereal" was actually cheese-its. If you think tea with orange juice tastes odd, you should try cheese-its with milk.
• I almost left home with two different shoes on my feet this morning. Luckily, they're cut very differently, so as soon as I walked out the door, one foot was noticeably colder than the other, which prompted me to look down and realize that I had on one summery sandal and one clog.
• When I was driving to work, I accidentally got into the wrong turn, turned right instead of left, and then drove A MILE DOWN THE ROAD before realizing that something was wrong.

Sadly Snowless

I can't believe it's already Thursday again--this past week flew by on gilded wings! And that right there is the beauty of not being in January anymore.

• It's COLD outside right now. Which might help explain why there's a gas station on my way to work that is currently having a special on plastic sleds and gliding saucers. Except that they seem to be forgetting the fact that in order to use sleds and gliding saucers, you need SNOW. Which we don't have. Which in turn explains why there was a very forlorn looking kid sitting in a sled on a patch of ice at the side of the road this morning. He was the saddest human being I've ever seen in my life.
• I went to the post office yesterday to mail a package and the options they gave me were: (1) use regular, first class mail, which takes three days and costs $2.36; or (2) use the super-duper, overnight mail, which takes under 24 hours and costs $31.55. Which means that I could've chosen to pay more on shipping than I spent on what was inside the package. Yeah. Makes sense.
• Somehow, I managed to shatter a highlighter this morning and spill fluorescent yellow ink ALL OVER the carpet. Luckily, the carpet is all dark and multi-colored, so you can't really see the stain under normal circumstances, but it does kind of glow in the dark now. I'm going to choose to be an optimist about this situation, so instead of saying, "Oh, no! I've damaged the carpet irreparably!" I'm going to say, "Hey, I've added glow-in-the-dark components to the carpet and made it easier and safer on the first person into the office in the morning AND the last person to leave in the evening."

Mirrors, Mustaches, and Mischief

Thank goodness it's Thursday, because I am sorely in need of a bullet post.

• I know it's bad luck if you break a mirror, but what if you just happen to be in the same room as a mirror that breaks? Is that still bad luck? Because the mirror in the bathroom of the restaurant where we ate lunch just randomly cracked while I was washing my hands, but I didn't do it! I swear! So do I get a pass on this one?
• I talked to a person in the hallway for 5 minutes before realizing that this person was someone with whom I've had at least 5 classes over the past three years. And I didn't even recognize him! And all because he went and grew a mustache.
• For the past several months, my bathroom rug keeps getting tossed around in the middle of the night and I've been blaming Black Cat for this because she's usually the one who does crazy things like that. As it turns out, Yellow Cat also has some deeply buried craziness issues, because at about 3 a.m. last night, I kicked him off the bed, then watched him go and take his anger out on the rug. Yellow Cat's status as my favorite pet is quickly dropping.

A Mish-Mash of A Post

• My car insurance bill this month had a very strongly worded statement about how, if I can't manage to pay my monthly bills on time, the privilege of being able to pay each month instead of every six months would be taken away. And? The statement was even IN BOLD. With RED LETTERING. It was all very official and I imagine this is what it feels like to be called to the Principal's office.
• I had a meeting with my advisor this morning. I promised her it would take no more than 20 minutes. In reality, it took nearly 50. But it was quite possibly the most helpful 50 minutes I've had since beginning my graduate program 2-and-a-half years ago, thanks in part to the statement made by my advisor that she will do physical harm to anyone who asks foolish questions about my research. Now that that's taken care of, all I have to worry about is the 20,000 possible NON foolish questions I might have to answer.
• Before I left the house this morning, I put one sock on my foot and the other sock in my purse. I'm still completely confused about this because WHAT in the world would possess a person to do that? I mean, it's not like putting on two socks is a complicated or novel process. It's something I do EVERY SINGLE DAY. There should be no room for error at this point.

Back In The Saddle Again

First, Happy 2009!

Second, the past two weeks have been the fastest two weeks of my life. Here's a (very) abbreviated summary:
-Drove to Mississippi. Had lots of contractions, and therefore, lots of related panic. But 800 ounces of water later, all was well.
-Nephew had a first birthday party, where he looked warily at the people, but enjoyed his toys.
-We had a not-so-much surprise baby shower, where we looked warily at the people who participated in the Sniff The Diaper game, but enjoyed the toys. And the food.
-McMoose got to feel The Bug kick for the first time, which means that I no longer have to wonder if I'm just hallucinating the movements.
-The poor, sad Matrix now has TWO cracks on the windshield instead of one. On the plus side, this will probably encourage me to (finally) take it in to be fixed. And on the plus-er side, at least this happened BEFORE I got the first crack fixed.
-The Dog has spent the past two weeks having his nose and eyes poked, his tail pulled, and his feet stepped on by our one-year-old nephew. And at some point, the kid found out that if he whapped The Dog's head with hard toys, it makes a funny hollow sound. It was also at this point that The Dog began sighing dramatically every time the kid entered the room. However, any time the kid fell and hurt himself, The Dog was the first responder on the scene, so I'm hoping that once The Bug gets here, his protective instincts will win out over his eat-the-annoying-small-person instincts.
-The cats are alive and well and very curious about the hand-me-down baby things we brought back with us. I'm still trying to convince McMoose it would be fun to see if Yellow Cat will fit into a newborn outfit, but so far, no luck. Yellow Cat probably appreciates McMoose's stance on this issue.

Just Can't Compose A Coherent Post...

There are some mornings when leaving the apartment is just the most difficult thing ever and this morning fell squarely within that category. I woke up at 5:30 and then lay in bed for the next 90 minutes alternately trying to fall back asleep or convince myself that I should get up and shower. I WANTED to get up and shower, but the bed was so warm and the rest of the room was so cold that the thought of standing in the coldness and waiting for the shower to warm up was just too much. Plus, The Dog was using my foot as a pillow and he moans pitifully when I disturb him. So instead, I stayed in bed and thought of all the strange things that could happen today. None of the things on this list actually happened, but that's not to say that my day was uneventful either...

-A squirrel tried to kill itself by jumping in front of my car at the last second. I swerved and splashed cold water on him instead. Serves him right, I feel.

-I got to work to find that someone had turned my computer on, opened up a Word document, and typed "Hi, Anisha" and left it on the screen. As far as I know, I was the only one at the office today AND yesterday, so apparently, the campus ghost has been skulking around.

-When I returned to my car after a (very much) shortened day at work, I found a guy from campus parking services standing there. Apparently, they've had a lot of people trying to use fake parking permits lately, so even though my car HAS A PARKING STICKER, he felt it was necessary to run my plates to see if I had actually been issued the pass. I asked him if the fake passes looked like the real ones and he replied, "No. It's pretty easy to pick them out." So...um...why was he running my plates?

-On the drive home, the car in front of me had a christmas tree tied to their roof and one of the branches came flying into my car. I thought my windshield would finally give up the fight and break, but it soldiered bravely on, so I continue to have an intact, albeit cracked, windshield.