Introducing...The Shiny Laptop

I recently got a new laptop, thanks to McMoose's connections with the mob. And by "the mob," I mean "the computer world." And it's very, very cool and very shiny, but it's been a few years since I've owned a laptop and it's taking me a while to get reacquainted with some of the, um, eccentricities. For example: the whole being mobile thing? It's fantastic. Except. The battery life is about an hour, maybe an hour and a half, depending on how benevolent it's feeling. And once I plug it in, I forget that I'm no longer mobile and I try to get up and walk around. End result? The computer has a hissy fit and shuts down and I have a Very Sore Leg from tripping over the cord.

And then there's the whole "Where's My Power Cord?" Drama, which is always fun, because for whatever reason, I CANNOT KEEP TRACK OF THE DAMN THING. At all. Ever. And one time, I even said to myself as I was placing it carefully upon my desk that "The power cord is on my desk. I will not forget that the power cord is on my desk. When I am looking for the power cord, I will remember that it is ON MY DESK." And 45 minutes later, I was accusing McMoose of stealing it and feeding it to the dog.

And if the power cord problems aren't bad enough, the laptop? It makes a noise. Like a kind of squeaky, whiny noise. Except that it makes it at strange intervals and whenever I try to show McMoose, it goes silent. So now, I look like a crazy girl who thinks her computer talks to her.