I'm not having a good technology day. Actually, most of my days are pretty far from perfect, technologically speaking--a fact that makes me believe that god or the universe made a mistake and that I should have actually been born into a Sub-Saharan tribe or a Sherpa family or an Amish community. You know, someplace where my woeful technological inadequacies would never be noticed?
Today, I got a call from our new cable lady, wondering how come I hadn't faxed back a form she had sent me three days ago. Here's the thing: I HAD faxed it back. Incorrectly, as it turns out. So after I spent about ten minutes trying to decipher what this woman was saying (did I mention that my cell phone hates me and refuses to get reception in my own apartment?), she managed to convince me that I had to resend the form RIGHT NOW! At which point, I had a rather unsettling argument with the laptop, which refused to open the attachment. And then another one with the printer, which spat out a piece of paper which was empty except for a rainbow colored splotch in one corner and then shut itself down.
By this point, of course, I was ready to call a moratorium on all technology for the REST OF MY LIFE, but the memory of the cable lady's angry voice kept me going. So after cajoling the printer with the promise of a Caribbean cruise, off I went to the nearest Kinko's, only to be faced with a fax machine that informed me that "The drum is unclean. Please remove the cover and clean the thread." Um. Drums? Threads? WHAT? Turns out, the Kinko's employee had no idea what was going on either, and after standing around and pushing various buttons, informed me that their fax machine was experiencing technical difficulties. To which I responded by saying that no, it wasn't their fax machine that was experiencing technical difficulties, IT WAS ME.
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